Trust In A Relationship
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I just saw Birdman.. I’ve seen surreal paintings (Dali), but this is the first surreal movie I’ve ever seen. Michael Keaton character breaking glasses across the room by simply pointing his finger or flying through the air like the Birdman, the part he played that made him famous.

I don’t make it my job to review the movie, but I enjoy using it to talk about relationships. It is my belief that the rock solid foundation of any love relationship is a strong ego. We have to believe in ourselves or we won’t believe anyone could love us. Or else we think that anyone who loves us is inadequate in some way and so we treat them like doo doo (the scientific word for poop).

We all have voices in our heads that chatter at us all our waking hours. It’s why we all need sleep – to escape the voices. That’s why meditation and yoga type activities are so important, because they teach us how to control the voices when we are awake.

Michael Keaton’s character has one mean, nasty voice in his head. Having to live with that you’re whole life is like having to be in prison.  The saddest about this main character is that he has misidentified the voice in his head. He thinks the voice is telling him the truth, but that is so far from the truth that it’s the opposite.

How can I explain this? I tell you that the mean voice is a saboteur/betrayer trying to keep you from being your best self, trying to keep you small and unconnected from what makes you special and significant.

Each of the characters had these insecurities, but Michael Keaton’s internal conflict was surreal. The surrealism was a theatrical construct, whatever that means, that puffs up the pain of his self doubt to the huge proportions of the superhero he once played .The battle within him was reality.

The main character was so plagued with these negative feelings that he needed all his energy to nurse his own ego and left him precious little time, insight, or inclination to notice or interact or care about anyone else, except on a very limited basis like the music in the background of his soul, or whatever that is.

But what has all this got to do with you? All the arts are a mirror held up for us to look at ourselves. And what do you see? Do you question why anyone would love you? Do you honor that love?

If you are having relationship issues and are confused about how to handle them, you may email me at

Merle M. Singer
Relationship problems? Author & personal coach Merle Singer is a relationship miracle worker. Her advice will help you take control of your relationships.


  1.' Jennifer Smith says:

    Sometimes the greatest art has its roots in the artists insecurities.

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